Saturday, May 28


We got to see some cool stuff tonight. It was amazing going through the Bellagio and Caesar's Palace. They had some sick shops. I mean sick. Can you say $425 Prada shoes? If only, kids.

I think that's why God may never make me rich because I would be a total fashionista. Of course, to be a Prada fashionista, I'd have to pay for plastic surgery and a personal trainer so I could wear the women's clothes. Or the men's clothes for that matter. That label thinks men are all 5'10" and 140 pounds. Yeah, right, Prada! Well, all labels think that I guess.

Women are scantily clad. This is not a place of purity, that's for sure. I kind of felt like a Disney character walking into a porn theater, you know? Ugh. That makes me shudder.

Anyway, we went to the Hard Rock and ate. Cheaply. It was cool. I guess everyone from LA comes into Vegas on the weekends because every beautiful person in the entire world was there. I'm a Barbie girl; in a Barbie World! It was really humbling. At moments I felt self conscious. I mean, I did not have on the most structured skirt, so I kinda felt fat to be honest. But I tried to push that idea out of my head. I need to do my thing you know? Quit comparing myself to others.

It's so easy to forget about my outreach mind and just get all caught up in what others think sometimes. I mean, truly, self - consciousness can keep me from reaching out and doing the little acts of servanthood that bring me so much joy. When I feel ugly or fat or gross or whatever, I tend to withdraw from the part of me that really thinks with a mission mind. It's wierd that I would even be able to notice what drives me to back away from that calling... But I guess it's cool too. Good that Christ has helped me to know myself that well, I guess.

I haven't really done my devotions in like 3 or 4 days and I know that has been contributing to my foul moods and snippy - ness with Gina. So, we plan on doing our devotions together tomorrow morning.

I need some JC Juice!

Please, Lord, rain your holy spirit upon me. I need your grace today and everyday, so I can shine your light to others.

Part of me is ready to go home. I miss Ohio. I miss my friends. I miss waking up to Gracie & Josh in the morning!

I miss Ben. I have found myself incapable of denying the fact that I'm missing him, and I want to see his smile. Yeah, I'm smitten. I'm in deep smit.

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