I can't believe you are gone. I keep wanting to call you, but then I remember you are with Jesus now. I wish I could have told you one more time how much I loved you. No one will ever understand all that we've been through together. Most of my young life it was me & you, all the time: getting sodas at Jr. Mart, shopping at Eastland Mall (before it was cool and renovated) or laughing together over something silly one of us did. You taught me so much about how to be strong, stand on my own and trust my own instincts above what others say. You had such a great sense of humor and I thank you so much for teaching me to laugh at myself. Sure, things weren't perfect. But as I got older and started letting Jesus into my life, he brought us together, healed us and taught us to forgive each other. Truly, these last few years have meant the most to me because they taught me so much of God's true love. I promise to tell your grandchildren how wonderful you were, show them your pictures and tell them stories about you. I'll tell them about you reaching out to others at dialysis in spite of your own pain and about how honored you were to be the Ambassador for the Evansville Kidney Foundation. I will tell them how much you loved them and wanted to meet them. I will tell them you are in heaven, and I will tell them how to get there. Thank you, Mom, for everything. I love you more than you will ever know. I will miss you every day. Please say "Hi" to Dad for me and tell him I will wait patiently to see you both again. I will remember the good times and I will always hold you dear to my heart.
Your loving daughter,
Monday, April 4
Wednesday, February 16
Wednesday, January 12
I always hope the pattern will change in someone. I pray that there has been a real, honest shift in the heart, but not everyone wants a healthy change in their life. Not everyone wants healthy communication. Sadly, some would rather hide in their fort they've spent their whole lives building up. And you have to let them. We can't change everyone. We can only change our pattern.