Tuesday, January 9

Wedding One: Check. Wedding Two: Commence.

How can you tell you're in your twenties? When you have more than one wedding a quarter to attend.

Good food. Good laughs. And two people experiencing a union that was "randomly" begun by a "chance" meeting in life. It's a good time.

I had a great weekend this past weekend. The wedding was absolutely beautiful and my friend Abby looked gorgeous. Ryan was glowing and looked absolutely handsome in his black suit.

I got to see many of my friends from DTS. Which I needed to see. I needed to see their smiling faces and hear their updates on life. I needed their embrace and their lended ears. There is an undeniable bond between all of us that probably no one outside will understand. We talked a lot about all of the fun stuff that happened during our times in Colorado, South Africa and Mexico. We recounted story after story and laugh after laugh. It was a great time.

I realized that I love these people. So very much. More than ever. It was so great talking to them. Each person was there for a reason. I could feel it. I felt God so close to me during this weekend.

I had a chance to really talk to people about what was going on in my life. I could totally be myself. I could totally open up and say what was on my mind. I could say the dumbest thing ever and get reprimanded for the lie I was believing and set straight on what God was saying.

At one point, I admitted that I didn't like being me. And I was going to counseling for answers on how to stop being so weird or neurotic or whatever. My friend Abbie was like, "Megan, you're not going to get those kind of answers from counseling. If that's what you are going there for, you are going for the wrong reasons. And I have no problem telling you that." And I knew in my spirit she was right.

I have been trying to stop me from being me all this time back here in Ohio. And I don't really know why. I am not even sure what I thought. All I know is I do have to be myself, while showing grace to those around me. I am not very good at that when I am caught up in my own pain. And I have been caught up in my own pain for awhile now.

I am done with all that.

I like being me! Who else can I be? Who else could be as goofy and serious all in one person? Me. That's who.

And forget my insecurity about being misunderstood. I gotta get over that. People may not understand me, and I have to be okay with that. I can't control others and make them do and think what I want them to. Although sometimes I have to admit that life would be a bit easier if I could make everyone my little robot droid people.

But what's the fun in that?

I just need to get my bearings back. I need to take a breath and realize that there is so much love and beauty that surrounds me every day. And that starts now.

I have six friends that found love and chose to celebrate it and seal it within the first few months of this year and that is really awesome. Funny. And crazy. And hilarious at times. But still so awesome. I mean, we are all just people roaming around on this planet and we "happen" to bump into each other and see that life would be better with this person in it. How weird and wonderful and not by chance at all is that?

It's totally God. Getting us to slow down and recognize that we don't have to do everything alone. But we can choose to open up and let love in and give love to someone else and see the beauty of something God joins together.

Life is crazy like that.

Bring on the weddings. I've got on my dancin' shoes.

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